The students would have made better grades if they had studied hard.
不少人认为”复杂句型”是高分的要件。所谓复杂句型就是利用各种
子句、
连接词、
分词、
片语等,将简单句扩充为绕来绕去的
长句。首先,它不易阅读,又容易出错,尤其是中间有时态、用字等问题。
“…. Graduating from a prestigious university, Jeremy gave up the road to
Wall Street, choosing his dream – NBA. With his marvelous story, he is not only the person I admire most but also everyone’s role model, teaching everyone insisting dreams and goals.”
这两句都有分词片语,但用法上必没有正确表达作者的意思。从连贯的角度,第一句中,看不出第二句所提的 ”marvelous” 的地方,少了一句说明他的成名。看下面改写是否让意思更完整,句子更通顺:
“With an Economics degree from a prestigious university, Jeremy gave up Wall Street and pursued his
NBA dream instead. He eventually became one of the fastest-rising stars in NBA history. His success story not just fascinates me but inspires me to stick to my goals. I want to be as successful as he in the future. That explains the reason I take him as my role model.”